Have you ever wondered why some people are just plain rude, always frustrated, constantly complaining, and blaming everyone else for the problems in their lives? Their presence and speech is extremely negative which makes us avoid them as much as possible. Even if we don’t personally know them, we can sense the bitterness. They may be shop owners, teachers, or a random person in line in front of us at the supermarket. You may have noticed that such folks often interact amongst themselves, which is acceptable, until we need to interact with them. It then becomes frustrating, and soon enough their behavior influences us.
It can be observed that the early years of this group of people may have been quite challenging. They may have had to, and continue to struggle with family, health, finance, careers, or relationship issues. As this persists without any hope of a resolution, their attitude begins to turn bitter. There is a limit to how much pain a person can endure, no matter how much patience or persistence one has. It becomes even more difficult when they notice that their friends and family are progressing with less effort, while they continue to strive and burn themselves out without seeing any results.
Very often we condemn this behavior and avoid interaction with such people. We respond to this type of behavior with exactly the same attitude that is projected. Instead, it would be wiser for us to understand what has triggered this behavior in them, which can assist us in guiding them and transforming their attitudes. We all struggle with challenges in our lives, even though some have a higher coping ability than others. These challenges are meant to help us become better, not bitter human beings. Each one of us is a like a diamond, and if we are agitated and irritated by every rub, which is disguised in the form of a problem, we cannot be polished, and will not evolve beyond the bitter state that we reflect.
If we have become bitter human beings, one way to overcome this is by changing our perspectives. It’s clearly evident that those who are responsible, trustworthy, and capable are the ones that are ‘offered’ more challenging roles. So, why don’t we consider ourselves blessed instead of doomed? This simple change in perspective will encourage us and continue to fuel our will power to persevere under any condition.
In addition to the change in perspective, expressing the attitude of gratitude is extremely powerful, and is an instant cure for bitterness. By changing our focus from the negative to the positive we will realize how lucky and blessed we actually are. However, the challenge is to remind ourselves to switch our focus while we are in the negative state. To achieve this, it is crucial to make gratitude a part of our daily routine. Maintaining a gratitude journal is the most powerful technique to remind us how blessed we are, and to refrain from the habit of constantly complaining. Every night, before going to bed, we can review the activities of the day and write down the events and people that we are grateful for. We can take this a step further, and write down the tasks that were accomplished on that day, and the tasks to be completed on the following day. This will not only lead us to more happiness, but it will also increase our productivity. This is a simple and effective technique, that we can start doing right away. Gratitude is the healthiest emotion and we must constantly express it in order to transform our lives.
The fact is that problems will never cease to exist, but our bitter behavior can. We can remind ourselves that when there is ease and simplicity in our lives, it is because of the lessons we have learned through our experiences over time; however, when we face obstacles and resistance, it is because there is more to learn. Finally, we will realize that the goal of life is to learn and grow. Therefore, with a positive attitude let us consider every struggle to be an opportunity to become better and humble human beings.
“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie
Source: Dino’s Words of Wsdom blog